The past year had been a tough year for me. For quite some time my mother-in-law had been very ill and had finally passed away just before Thanksgiving. A few days following her passing, I was gathered with friends and family to laugh and to cry, and to remember the woman that we all loved. On that same afternoon, I received a call from my mentee and was told in a rather frantic voice that his pet rat “Brain” had died in a tragic accident. He asked if I would come over and help him with the burial. I said sure. But I was thinking to myself that the timing was really not that great. I decided to go anyway and excused myself from the gathering to meet my mentee and help with the proceedings.

When I arrived at my mentee’s house, I was rather shocked that poor Brain was taped inside an empty Pop Tart box. I thought for a second about the Pop Tart box, and then realized that it was quite an appropriate final resting place for the rat. As I gathered my thoughts, it hit me that I had never presided over this type of service before. So, I decided to jump right in and ask if anyone had anything that they would like to say about Brain. Sure enough, my mentee had some final words to say and I also had a few thoughts on the good character that Brain had displayed during his life. We cried and bowed for a moment of silence and Brain was quietly returned to the earth. We placed a simple wooden headstone at the gravesite and agreed to return in the future and engrave a final thought. As with most memorial services, there is usually a meal to follow, and, of course, this one was no different. We feasted on double cheeseburgers, fries and a giant chocolate shake.

That day I got a little glimpse into what being a mentor was all about. Being a mentor is about being there at ground zero and getting your hands dirty with life and death. My mentee lost his beloved pet rat and I lost my mother-in-law, but we both gained a deeper friendship and shared a moment in time that would last forever.

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*names and photos of clients are ficticious to protect their identity