Self-centeredness is the enemy of love which is why therapists try to teach empathy and attunement to couples, parents and kids. When one can put oneself in another person’s shoes, then many of the walls which may have grown up between them can start to lower. Afterall, isn’t that the beauty and the risk of love--being willing to put someone else’s wellbeing ahead of your own?
Every Thursday I meet with a group of men who all encourage each other to be better. Better husbands, fathers and people in general. Last February, one of the guys came to the group with a challenge for himself and the rest of us. The challenge was to buy a journal and then every day for a year write one thing that you love or admire about your wife or children or other significant person in your life. I accepted this challenge and the end product will be given to my wife on Valentine’s Day 2017.
Besides being a Resource Parent for the Family Care Network, I get to participate in some of the trainings the agency holds for newly hired staff members. The first big training that everyone goes through is on Trauma-Informed Care. Every new hire at Family Care participates in this training, whether you are in Facilities, IT, admin, or have been hired as a Rehabilitation Specialist or Social Worker—everyone starts their new job at FCNI learning how trauma affects the brain and how to support one another by staying calm and balanced. We teach what it means to respond to one another from a place of love versus reacting to them from a place of fear.